Self-Introduction
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Dear Professor Blackstone,
My name is Yi Jia, most refer to me as Kayden. I am writing this formal letter to introduce myself, as one of your students undertaking your critical thinking and communication module. I believe that good communication is vital in a professional and informal setting, as it can foster better collaboration with others.
My educational background includes a diploma in mechanical engineering from Singapore Polytechnic specializing in precision engineering. I pursued engineering as I love the idea of being able to create anything from my mind into reality. The process of utilizing software to design, and create a blueprint, as well as a programming a CNC machine, to fabricate a product is fascinating.
I was fortunate to be an armaments technician while in the Army, where my knowledge of engineering allowed me to be a better technician with regards to small arms (hand-held weapons) and heavy arms (artillery howitzers). I was also able to work on my communication skills, as when performing maintenance on heavy arms in a team, there are always potential hazards that can inflict injuries. My ability to engage in clear and concise communication with others helps us get the job done while being safe. However, my greatest weakness is in public speaking. As I tend to stutter and mispronounce some words as I get nervous when speaking to a crowd of strangers.
I have 2 goals in mind for this module, to overcome public speaking and to refine my active listening skills. With these 2 skills, I believe I can communicate better and engage in better collaboration with others.
What makes me unique is my curiosity as well as my determination to satisfy my curiosity, I am not just drawn to theoretical aspects, I thrive on practical applications. I remember during a routine inspection of small arms, a SAR21 (semi-automatic rifle) made a weird click when releasing of the charging handle. I spent the entire day flipping through manuals and detail-stripping the rifle, only to discover it was because of a small worn-out spring.
I look forward to learning more in your classes, and I am confident this module will contribute significantly to our personal development into becoming a better engineer.
Kayden
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Dear Professor Blackstone,
My name is Yi Jia, most refer to me as Kayden. I am writing this formal letter to introduce myself, as one of your students undertaking your critical thinking and communication module. I believe that good communication is vital in a professional and informal setting, as it can foster better collaboration with others.
My educational background includes a diploma in mechanical engineering from Singapore Polytechnic, I chose to specialize in precision engineering as I love the idea of being able to create anything from my mind into reality. The process of utilizing software to design, and create a blueprint, as well as a programming a CNC machine, to fabricate a product is fascinating.
I was fortunate to be an armaments technician while in the Army, where my knowledge of engineering allowed me to be a better technician with regards to small arms (hand-held weapons) and heavy arms (artillery howitzers). I was also able to work on my communication skills, as when performing maintenance on heavy arms in a team, there are always potential hazards that can inflict injuries. My ability to engage in clear and concise communication with others helps us get the job done while being safe. However, my greatest weakness is in public speaking. As I tend to stutter and mispronounce some words as I get nervous when speaking to a crowd of strangers.
I have 2 goals in mind for this module, to overcome public speaking and to refine my active listening skills. With these 2 skills, I believe I can communicate better and engage in better collaboration with others.
What makes me unique is my curiosity as well as my determination to satisfy my curiosity, I am not just drawn to theoretical aspects, I thrive on practical applications. I remember during a routine inspection of small arms, a SAR21 (semi-automatic rifle) made a weird click when releasing of the charging handle. I spent the entire day flipping through manuals and detail-stripping the rifle. Only to find out it was because of a small worn out spring.
I look forward to learning more in your classes, and I am confident this module will contribute significantly to our personal development into becoming a better engineer.
Kayden
Hey Kayden! Your letter is well-written and did stated all the pointers required. You did illustrate examples of your communication and weakness as well. Your language use and content is really good. I indeed enjoyed reading your letter!
ReplyDeleteHi Shajesh,
DeleteThank you so much for your kind words and positive feedback on my letter. I`m glad to hear you found it well-written and comprehensive.
Your letter is interesting as it demonstrates how you applied your communication skills and engineering knowledge during your army life. The content of your letter is well elaborated on all the key points and is presented in a clear and organized manner.
ReplyDeleteHi Rachel,
DeleteI`m delighted to know that you enjoyed reading it, thank you for the kind feedback, it encourages me to continuing working on my communication skills in writing.
hey kayden, i like how your letter is clear and in an organized manner. you have used the PEEL format to explain your points well. i like how you are able to apply your engineering skills such as troubleshooting in the real world.
ReplyDeleteHi Sky,
DeleteThanks for the feedback and appreciating the clarity and organization of my letter. I`m glad that you noticed the application of my engineering skills, your feedback is genuinely appreciated.
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ReplyDeleteDear Kayden,
ReplyDeleteThank you for the highly informative, articulate letter. It's well organized and richly detailed as you provide ample examples to illustrate the important points you make about yourself.
I'm especially impressed in this post by how you explain your interest in engineering by seeing it as a means of creation, moving from ideation to blueprint to fabrication, which is a satisfying thing indeed.
You also detail your army experience and work with armaments, and you mention how vital effective communication is in that context, even stating that within a team, where there are potential hazards, miscommuniaction could lead to 'njuries.' I'd suggest a specific example here might have helped illustrate this.
In terms of language use, this is really a fine showing, but there are a couple things to take note of, expecially in light of the sentence structure issues I mentioned in class Tuesday:
-- My educational background includes a diploma in mechanical engineering from Singapore Polytechnic, I chose to specialize in precision engineering as I love the idea of being able to create anything from my mind into reality. > (comma splice) ?
-- Only to find out it was because of a small worn out spring. > (fragment)
We may discuss these items in class as well. :)
I look forward to learning more from you this term.
Brad
Hi Prof. Brad,
DeleteThank you for taking the time to read my letter.
i`m glad to hear that you found the letter informative and well-organized.
i see with your point about the importance of providing a specific example in the context. I`ll make sure to incorporate a relevant example to strength that part of my letter.
Regarding the language, i understand the issues you`ve pointed out and i will work on addressing them.
I look forward to the discussions in class and the opportunity to learn more from you. Please share any further insights or suggestion as they are highly valuable to me.
Best regards,
Kayden